Steps

Step 1: Mark your wall. (Not pictured)

Step 2: Start laying down the tape.

 This.

 Takes.

 Forever.
Step 3: Buy some paint samples and randomly throw some color up on the wall.

 Step 4: Beg your husband to finish the job because who in their right mind decided that I had this much extra time and patience?!
(He doesn't indulge me.)
Step 5: Take a 1-2 day break
Step 6: Get a sudden burst of energy at 10:00 one night and finish painting.

Step 7: Yell "Freeeedommmm" as you tear that tape off the wall to discover your beautifully painted "tile look alike" backsplash.

Step 8: Cry. You've only done one wall.